Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
