just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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