sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
