I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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