Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize