I have demons in me.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
