well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize