The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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