when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
