im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
he was CRYING into my vagina
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Randomize