Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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