halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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