Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Pants are for mortals
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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