it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
