Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
We are two peas in an std pod
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
