All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
