Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize