So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
