i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
