I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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