Everything about him screamed your future.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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