So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
