CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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