My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
