Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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