I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize