Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize