Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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