I hate your face
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize