I love black thongs
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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