well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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