I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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