called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
