to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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