Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
3pm strippers are depressing
40s are totally the cure
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
