Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
