Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Drunk is not a location!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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