she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize