you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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