Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Randomize
