I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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