Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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