Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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