I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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