You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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