I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize