hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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