Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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