I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
