discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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